It&rsquo;s easy to say, "Eat the rich". But life at the top isn&rsquo;t all champagne and roses. And on election day, industrialist Harsh Goenka, whose net worth is estimated at $4.1 billion&mdash;making him the 76th&nbsp;richest Indian according to a Forbes ranking&mdash;took to social media platform X to share the woes of the affluent.
The rest of Mumbai may line up to vote, with no inkling of the challenges facing these elite warriors.
But, as Goenka pointed out in his painfully honest (yes, we know he meant it to be snarky satire, thanks!) post, the affluent of Malabar Hill face an existence fraught with hardship.
For starters, how does one select the right car to the polling booth? Does one choose a Mercedes&nbsp;that&nbsp;whispers &ldquo;dignified restraint&rdquo;, or a BMW that shouts&nbsp;&ldquo;economic optimism&rdquo;?&nbsp;In the background, chauffeurs debate tire alignment while their&nbsp;designer-clad patrons wrestle with existential dread: Which&nbsp;designer&nbsp;sunglasses&mdash;Gucci or Prada&mdash;will shield their weary eyes from the November sun?
And what of footwear? Designer loafers weren&rsquo;t made for uneven pavements. They were crafted for marble floors and valet parking, which, tragically, remain absent at polling stations.&nbsp;Should they risk their Manolo Blahniks for democracy or retreat to WhatsApp debates over quinoa salads?&nbsp;It&rsquo;s not their fault that the masses choose governments that can&rsquo;t even manage basic infrastructure, right?&nbsp;
The horrors don&rsquo;t end there. Imagine&mdash;just imagine&mdash;encountering (shudder) ordinary people while standing in a queue!&nbsp;No private lounges or scented hand towels here, only the collective discomfort of shared space. The heat, the stares, the fleeting risk of a smudge on a perfectly curated Manish Malhotra ensemble, the horror &mdash;it&rsquo;s all too much.
Then there&rsquo;s the ultimate sacrifice: time. Moments spent at polling stations could have been invested in debates over the efficacy of Ozempic versus Mounjaro, because while democracy can wait, as Goenka puts it: the waist cannot!
So, let&rsquo;s observe a moment of silence to honour the &ldquo;silent struggles&rdquo; of the Malabar Hill aristocrats, whose sacrifices remain unacknowledged by a world that dares to call them privileged.
Who cares about governance when the masses can always fall back on the &ldquo;Spirit of Mumbai&rdquo;? After all, nothing cuts deeper than a slight mismatch between one&rsquo;s designer shades and the democratic process.&nbsp;

A retired IAF officer and his wife cast their vote early. Will Malabar Hill care?

Tragic tales of the rich, according to industrialist and 76th richest Indian, Harsh Goenka

The Trials of Malabar Hill

Tragic tales of the rich, according to industrialist and 76th richest Indian, Harsh Goenka

November 20, 2024 | 11:30 IST